Some mornings, my body wakes up before I do not in a good way. The stiffness hits first. Then the burning in my joints, the weight of fatigue, and the mental math of how much I need to do versus what my body will allow. And just as I’m processing all of it, I hear it: “Mom?” It’s go time. Whether my body is ready or not.
Parenting through pain living with chronic illness is something you don’t understand until you’re living it. There’s no guidebook for how to juggle flares and fevers with school drop-offs and snack requests. But somehow, we find a way. We adapt. We show up over and over again. Even when it hurts. That’s the part I don’t think we say out loud enough: that just showing up is a quiet form of bravery.
Mornings Feel Like Marathons
I used to think mornings were just hectic. Now I know they can feel like climbing a mountain before breakfast. It starts before the kids are even out of bed. I’m negotiating with my body waiting for meds to kick in, stretching out joints that feel like they’ve been rusted shut overnight, and trying to summon the energy to pour cereal. There’s no fast-forward button. But somehow, I do it. Not perfectly, but consistently. And that counts.
Parenting Through a Flare Isn’t for the Faint of Heart
Flares don’t wait for a convenient time. They crash in like a wrecking ball on picture day, birthday party day, or the one day you didn’t plan a backup dinner. On those days, everything feels harder. Even small things like making a sandwich or brushing your child’s hair can feel like a full-body workout. But we adjust. We pivot. We build blanket forts, cuddle up with books, and teach our kids the power of slowing down. We get creative with love and energy conservation. It’s not Pinterest-perfect but it’s real.
We Show Up With Superpowers
Not the kind you see in movies. Not flying or invisibility. The kind of superpowers that don’t make noise. Getting out of bed even when it feels impossible. Smiling through pain. Laughing at dinner even though you’ve been fighting fatigue all day. That’s strength. That’s motherhood. That’s us. The world doesn’t always see it. But our kids do. And whether they’re old enough to say it or not, they know they’re being loved by someone incredibly strong.
Redefining What a ‘Good Mom’ Looks Like
Maybe you didn’t make it to the class party. Maybe dinner was cereal. Maybe the laundry is piling up.You are still a good mom. You’re teaching your children what it means to care for others and yourself. You’re modeling resilience, empathy, and what it looks like to keep going when things are hard.
To the Mom in Pain: A Mother’s Day Letter to the Chronic Illness Warrior
This Mother’s Day, I want to say something to the moms out there who are parenting through pain: I see you.
I see the way you keep showing up, even when your body is screaming. I see the love you pour into your kids, even when your cup feels empty. I see the strength it takes just to get through the day.
You are not alone.
You are not failing.
You are a warrior.
So here’s to you moms who parent through pain, fatigue, flares, and everything in between. You’re doing more than enough. And you are so deeply loved.
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Happy Mother’s Day. You are everything your kids need and more.
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